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Prep yourself for firing over the holidays
Posted on December 4, 2006 4:57 PM
People find it so easy to get caught up in the little things during the holiday season – shopping for gifts, planning for family get-togethers, watching the Charlie Brown Christmas special – that they may neglect a golden opportunity to skip work by playing sick.
Survey says tis the season to fake an illness...
"We do know just anecdotally in dealing with employers that there certainly is a higher rate ... associated with holidays, catching up on shopping, or spending time with family and friends," said Jennifer Sullivan, spokeswoman for CareerBuilder.com, which conducts an annual survey of employee absenteeism. "You do see a higher incidence."Cool! But beware. Calling in sick without a good reason can make you fodder for my next blog post. My new favorite author, Ellie Bishop, author of The Sick Day Handbook, has a lot of tips for faking it good...
The firm's survey, released this week, showed 32 percent of workers said they called in sick when they felt fine at least once in the last year, and one in 10 said they did so three times or more.
Women were more likely to take a sick day when they are not sick than men, by 37 to 26 percent, the survey said.
She suggests if you're claiming a migraine headache, know there are two kinds, cluster and classic. Claiming Lyme disease is handy, because one symptom is irritability. Conjunctivitis and irritable bowel syndrome are good excuses because no one wants to hear about the symptoms.You might want to leave your copy of her book at home instead of bringing it to the office, or leaving it in your car where your boss can see it when she parks next to it in the morning.
Call in with your excuse to a co-worker early, before the boss arrives, clear your throat for five minutes beforehand and hold your nose as you speak, she suggests.
Never make up anything that might need to be proven, like a doctor's appointment or a trip to a hospital emergency room, she writes.
Only try it two or three times a year and, above all, remember your lie, she adds.
"I think we can get away with a lot more than we think we can," she said.
Irritable bowel syndrome. Ewwwwwwww.
Technorati Tags: Fired, Making excuses, Skipping work